by Steve Wagers

What's Your Excuse?
Pastor Steve N. Wagers
Luke 14:15-24

1. Excuses! They are a dime a dozen. They are a lot like opinions: everybody has them. I think of some of the most interesting that I have ever run across. I think of a doctor who reported that one evening he was driving too fast, and he made the mistake of driving past a police car. Once the police car saw this it speeded up right behind him. Thinking fast, the doctor reached into his medical bag and lifted his stethoscope. He waved it out the window at the police car, and the man in the police car nodded and slowed down and stopped at the side of the road. Amazingly, he got away with it.

2. A few days later the same doctor was driving down the same road, and again he passed the same police car. But this time the police car came up beside him, the policeman rolled the window down, stuck his hand out the window, and was dangling a set of handcuffs.

3. I think of a time in New Zealand, when a woman was driving for 25 years without a driving license. She explained to the judge who fined her, and gave her excuse:

'I only drive on roads that have very little traffic, and none of those roads lead to an office where I could apply for a drivers license'. That's a women driver for you!

4. After discussing how students must at least be competent in reading, writing, listening, analyzing and computing before they will be graduated from high school in 1998, one administrator contacted provided the following list. The excuses it contains were actually turned in by parents to one school district, in Tillamonk County, New York. The top 7 are listed below:

1. Dear school: Please ackuse John for bring absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and 33.
2. Mary could not come to school because she is bothered by very close veins.
3. Please excuse Gloria. She has been sick and under the doctor.
4. Please excuse Ray Friday. He has lose vowels.
5. Please excuse Joyce from P.E. for a few days.
6. Y ...

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