A Word From Your Pilot (10 of 10) by Jeff Strite

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A Word From Your Pilot (10 of 10)
Series: This World Is Not My Home
Jeff Strite
1 Peter 5:1-11

OPEN: On a Continental flight a pilot began his usual comments to the passengers:

''Ladies and gentlemen, good afternoon and welcome on board Continental flight 428. This is your Captain speaking and I have some information about our flight. We've reached cruising altitude of 35,000 ft. and will be turning down the cabin lights.

Turning down the lights is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants.''

''Just a few observations: There may be 50 ways to leave your lover but there are only 4 ways off this airplane. In case of an emergency your flight attendant will assist you on leaving the plane. In the event of an emergency water landing your seat cushions can be used for flotation; if that happens please paddle to shore and take the cushions with our compliments.''

Later, after the plane landed and passengers were about to disembark, the pilot again came on and said: ''As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be evenly distributed among the flight attendants. Please… do not leave children or spouses.''

APPLY: Now, obviously, that pilot was just having fun with the passengers. I'm sure he'd grown tired of saying the same stale speech over and over again for weeks on end and just wanted to liven thing up a bit. But most of the time pilots and airplane crews are very serious about their instructions. In fact, one webpage I visited had wordings pilots would use in every possible contingency - it went on for 4 pages when I copied it into my files. I found that there were speeches the pilot might give in the event of:

-Turbulence, where the plane was shaken by cross winds of downdrafts.
-Depressurization of the cabin of the plane
-Aborted takeoffs where the plane was forced to stay on the tarmac.
-Bomb threats
-Hi-jackings… and so on.

Apparently there are airlin ...


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