A Brand New You (4 of 4) by Jeff Schreve

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A Brand New You (4 of 4)
Series: All I Want for Christmas
Jeff Schreve
Luke 18:18-23

Now, how many in here have already finished your Christmas shopping, I see your hands? Okay. How many still have a ways to go? Can I see your hands?

I was not at the mall yesterday, but my daughters were at the mall. They said the mall was very, very crowded yesterday. That's a good thing for our economy. And when you are looking for the Christmas gift, you want to give a good gift, right? And you want to get a good gift. How many people in here have ever gotten a really crummy gift, may I see your hand? (laughter). Really crummy.

I was reading online about some really crummy gifts. John Artberg is a pastor. He said one time, one Christmas, he got 3 nose hair trimmers (laughter) I mean, what are people trying to tell you when they give you a nose hair trimmer? (laughter). Quit sniffing the monoxidril, John! I mean you got a problem, 3 nose hair trimmers. He got the point.

I heard about a lady in Phoenix, Arizona. She talked about getting a bad gift. She said, ''I got a set of curlers. They were obviously used before because there was hair still in them'' (laughter).

One lady said she got a box of candy that was obviously a regift because half the pieces had a bite mark in them (laughter). Is that not nasty? That is just gross.

Facial Hair Lightning Cream for the woman of your dreams. Could you imagine somebody giving you that? They really sell that. ''Here, baby, I got this for ya! Hide that mustache!'' I mean, it's just a bad gift.

Now I got the worst gift ever from a vendor. I got it just this past week. You know, every time somebody sends something, you get excited about it. And this is what I got. It came in a box. It came from California. I was all jazzed. What is this going to be? Pink flamingo to go in my yard! I thought, What am I going to do with this? And then, I thought, I'm going to give it to Larry (laughter) for a gift. But don't tell hi ...


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