A Cemetery Is a Good Place
A cemetery is a good place. I'll wager some of you are thinking, ''That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. I always thought the preacher was a half a sandwich shy of a picnic and now I know it.'' Most of us would probably insist, ''There's nothing good about a cemetery.'' And for good reason! Before I am done today, I hope you change your mind.
Few of us associate cemeteries with anything good and certainly not anything funny. Just to get us off on the right foot, let me share my two favorite cemetery stories.
On the outskirts of a small town, an old cemetery contained a huge pecan tree. It grew just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys headed to the cemetery to collect enough that their mothers could make them their favorite pies. The two sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the pecans. ''One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.'' They counted out the pecans. As they did, a few rolled the hill toward the fence.
About that time, another boy rode by on his bicycle. He thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, ''One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.'' He immediately jumped back on his bike and took off as fast as he could peddle. Just around the bend, he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along. ''Come quick,'' he said, ''you won't believe what I heard! The Devil and the Lord are at the cemetery dividing up the souls.'' The man said, ''Beat it kid. I haven't got time for your foolishness.''
The boy insisted. Slowly the man hobbled after him to the cemetery. They listened by the fence. ''One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me.'' The old man whispered, ''Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can get a look.'' Shaking with fear, they snuck up close to the fence. Just then they heard, ''That's the last of them. Now let's get those nuts by the fence and we'll be ...
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