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Definitions of Political Systems

Pulpit Helps, August, 1992, p. 8

1. Communism: You have two cows. The government takes both of them and gives you part of the milk.

2. Socialism: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

3. Fascism: You have two cows. The government takes both cows and sells you the milk.

4. Nazism: You have two cows. The government takes both cows, then shoots you.

5. Bureaucracy: You have two cows. The government takes both of them, shoots one, milks the other, then pours the milk down the drain.

6. Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one of them and buy a bull.

7. In a democracy, everyone has two cows, then a vote is taken, and whatever the majority decides to do, you do, and that's no bull!