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Definitions of Political Systems

Pulpit Helps, August, 1992, p. 8

Communism:

You have two cows.

The government takes both of them and gives you part of the milk.

Socialism:

You have two cows.

The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

Fascism:

You have two cows.

The government takes both cows and sells you the milk.

Nazism:

You have two cows.

The government takes both cows, then shoots you.

Bureaucracy:

You have two cows.

The government takes both of them, shoots one, milks the other, then pours the milk down the drain.

Capitalism:

You have two cows.

You sell one of them and buy a bull.

Democracy

everyone has two cows

A vote is taken, and whatever the majority decides to do, you do, and that's no bull!